To market, to market...

Hey! We're a happy family! Look at us, all well rested, full of cheer, at the wholesome Carrboro Farmer's Market this morning.

We love the farmer's market. We've not been able to go much lately because I've been desperately catching up on sleep on Saturday mornings. But now we all sleep through the night, miracle of all miracles, and so we're able to set off for family fun on weekend mornings.

Ronin seemed to enjoy our buying vegetables for Vasu's mom's visit. He is always so quiet and alert and happy in his Bjorn, and he digs the sights and sounds of community events. 

Oh, and I should mention that he's wearing a bib to protect against being cold and wet from his drool, as my mom suggested. And his cap was knit by Molly Chase, my sister's lifelong best friend.

At the market, we got eggplant and okra and peppers and greens to make into curries with Vasu's mom's magic touch. She arrives today to spend a week with her grandson and will be cooking him lots of tasty Indian food. Oh, if only he could eat it! But he will -- next year. For now, he'll just get to enjoy some spicy milk, and he'll have a great time playing with his grandmother. 

We're free!

The baby has begun to sleep through the night! 

We can't believe it!

My mom, my dad, my friends, my sister, they've all told me that eventually I would tire of sleeping with Ronin and that both he and I would sleep much, much better if he had his own space. 

I thought they were all heartless monsters and that the thing to do was to keep my child close to me at night for a long, long time.

But he was waking every hour and a half and it just wasn't working for either of us. So finally my friend Daria came over and helped us put Ronin to sleep in his own crib in his own room last Wednesday night.

Vasu and I went out to dinner while she did the deed because I was so afriad he'd cry and it would be awful and I'd break out in a hot sweat and not be able to stand it.

He didn't cry at all! He fussed for a bit while getting comfortable and then drifted right off. And he slept for 11 hours straight, with no waking, no nursing, not a peep from his room all night. 

It was unbelievable. Vasu and I did not believe it. We kept waking up that first night and checking on him, listening to the silence, wondering if he was cooing for us. 

But no! We're now through the 3rd night of this miracle and it seems to be holding true for us! Ronin sleeps through the night, soundly and happily, in his own crib, in his own room. I have been freed from hours and hours of nursing and we're off duty from 7:30 pm until 6:00 a.m. 

We have a whole new lease on life.

Curfew

Here we are, at the Carrboro Music Festival last Sunday. These pictures make it look like we were the only 3 people at the whole event, but it was actually packed with people and loaded with bands of all sorts. Vasu's pictured standing in front of the high school stage -- some of the freshest music at the festival was performed there. Of course, you'd never know it from our shots.

Don't we look like a happy bunch? It was a good day and we had a lovely time strolling around the festival. But as the clock struck 7, we had to go home. Ronin skipped a nap to let us wander for hours, and that was darling of him, but his bedtime is still 7:30, regardless of the fun being had. 

As we drove home, night fell, and a gorgeous, warm, music-filled night it was, too. And I felt so imprisoned! When will I ever go out at night again? I know I will, I know Ronin's babyhood (and constant nursing) will not last forever, but I've been home every night (except for a rare few) by 7:00 since this boy was born. 

My new schedule: up by 6:00 a.m., (really, up all night), and home by 7:00 p.m. I didn't realize how free I was before! So free! I look at people whose children are grown and I think...it must be such a relief. Children grown, back to being on your own again. Ahhhhh. 

But I hear parents always worry about their children, even when they're grown, so I may have signed up for a lifetime of heaviness without even knowing it.

It ain't easy to take care of a babe, that's for sure. It's lots of things, but it's not easy. Shoot. I thought it was.

Great times with the greats

This weekend we packed up the family and stole off in the dark of night to visit Ronin's great-grandparents and great-aunt and uncle in Snead's Ferry, NC. Night travel is a necessity because Ronin loathes his car seat and howls if a trip is longer than 10 minutes. So Vasu was super-heroic and drove while Ronin slept to see the family down East.

We had a really wonderful visit with Goggie, Aunt Candy, and Uncle Kerry. It's so special to have four generations together. It really warms my heart for Ronin to play with his great-grandparents! We miss them and can't wait to visit with them again.

Visit to the Temple

Today we went to the Won-Buddhist Meditation Temple so that Ronin could meet my favorite Buddhist priests around.

We chanted and sang and meditated and ate banana bread and drank ginger tea. 

I attended the Temple for years before my pregnancy and went for regular prayers while I carried Ronin, so it was very cool to bring him there today so that he could experience it on his own. 

He absolutely loved Rev. Wongong and Rev. Ildug and the other women who were there helping them get ready for next month's Temple bazar. He was jolly and alert and peaceful the whole time. We had a great visit and will go back again next Tuesday. I'm so glad -- I've really missed going and I know it will be a wonderful influence on Ronin to be around such compassionate and loving people. 

Happy Birthday, Daddy!

Today's Vasu's birthday, and even though he sometimes forgets about it, Ronin hasn't!

Happy birthday, Daddy. I'm glad I inherited your handsome good looks!

So tired

We love Ronin very much.

But he has been waking up the past few nights, fussing and crying, wanting to be bounced and held back to sleep. And just when you think he's asleep and you ease into bed, he squirms and wakes up and makes pitiful noises and it's back to the ball you go with him.

Something has got to give.

I think he's teething. He seems to be in pain. We gave him some baby Tylenol last night. He still awoke whimpering and crying over and over.

O where is the other set of parents who can come in and take over for us for a day or two? We need to get some sleep and hang out with each other, just the two of us, for awhile. I have started lining up babysitters to come play with him during the day for an hour or two but who in the world wants to come help us with 3 am duty? No one! This is our own personal hell!

Thank God he's cute. Right now, he's playing on his quilt and giving me huge smiles (why the pain only at night?) and it's hard to remember how much I wanted to chuck him a few hours ago...

Oh, and he's also starting to smell really nice. There's a very sweet baby scent that's begun wafting off of him. It's a protective measure, I know it. A fragrant aura that keeps you kissing him even though you're out of your mind with fatigue.

Motivation

In keeping with my promise to thank people for all of their sweet gifts to the baby, I dedicate this post to my wonderful Aunt Candy. Here is Ronin, inspired to roll over and scoot along in order to enjoy the beautiful quilt and quilted elephant his Great Aunt Candy gave him. I took about 500 pictures in this series and have had to limit myself to posting just a few. But they're just so cute. Look what Ronin can do! He can roll over and scoot and play with things! 

Next, he will be bringing his mother flowers. Sweet boy.

Smiley

Happy weekend, everybody!

We're going to a pig-picking to celebrate a friend's doctoral degree, and we'll be meeting other friends for brunch and catching up on chores around the house.

What are you doing this weekend?

Hangin' with friends

Today, Ronin met his dear auntie Daria at Weaver Street Market, the local co-op, for a cup of tea. Ronin and Daria were also joined by Daria's dear friend Diana and Daria's daughter Leyla. Leyla's heading off to Tonga for a year of service next week, so this was Ronin's chance to say goodbye to her. Next time he sees her, he'll be able to walk right up to her and give her a hug!

Labor day with grandparents

We were honored Monday with a Labor Day visit from my dad and Marilyn, Ronin's Grandaddy and M. We all had a great time watching the US Open and catching up. Even though Grandaddy and M live in Raleigh, very close by, each time he sees his them, he's changed so much.

This weekend, Grandaddy and M are in Atlanta, visiting with Ronin's cousin Julia. We send them big kisses!

Bouncy-ball meditation

The circle: the symbol for eternity, for the universe. Also, the shape of a bouncy-ball, the giant Pilates ball, that I spend a lot of time sitting on, bouncing Ronin to sleep.

Ever since I had Ronin, I have been grumbling to myself and others that I don't have time to do the things I need to do for basic self-care: yoga, exercise, meditation. I've been really missing going to the meditation temple lately and I know it would help me to be a better mother if I were going and practicing with the good people there.

The other day I was bouncing Ronin to sleep, looking in his eyes, willing them to close. Getting frustrated with him as he fussed and tossed about, finding myself frowning and muttering "Sleep, Ronin, SLEEP!" 

And I realized that I wasn't providing a good sleep environment like that.  I was making a lovely moment crappy for me and for him. If I missed meditation, I should meditate right there, on the ball. Better for both of us.

So I did. I breathed in and out, in and out, and stopped worrying about if he did what I wanted him to or not. He fell asleep so quickly. I could feel his little body relax right into my arms.  We both got so much more out of it that way.

Now I can't complain that I don't have time to meditate. I do, every moment I'm here. But especially in the quiet time as Ronin slips into sleep. He and I will be much better off if I can remember to let go like this over and over again, all along the way.